I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
