You're completely useless in the revolution.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Michael Bay diarrhea
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
