u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
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I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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