I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
