I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I touched a dick in church today
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
