Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
