i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
she smelled like a LAN party
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize
