You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Mom said you looked used
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
