You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
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