Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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