That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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