one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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