I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
my sisters under your porch take her home
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You took a bar mat shot.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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