He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize
