I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Randomize
