She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize