BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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