the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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