I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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