I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
