A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
