Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
