she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
