If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
