this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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