i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've created a new STD.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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