i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
