i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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