The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
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