I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Vodka?
Forever.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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