I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
i think i just lost a toe
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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