btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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