You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You may now shotgun with the bride
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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