I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
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I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
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Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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