so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
