So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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