You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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