I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
kristin has been a bad kristin
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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