Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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