whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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