PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
