marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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