i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
being pregnant is like rehab
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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