Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
