I can text with my tongue
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
