Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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