Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
