its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
