I wannas sexs uuuuu
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
