Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
